Cruel Summer

So, it’s summer, and I have to admit, this is my least favorite season, by a wide margin. I’d rather trudge to the train in 6 inches of driven slush, than walk there during the peak of a NYC heatwave. The way it just radiates off the pavement, bouncing off the brick walls and city streets, this city becomes an oven, and I don’t much care for it.

When this season of misery hits, and even the breeze does little more than move a new patch of hot air into the spaces where the old patches of hot air were, I am overtaken by a monstrously cranky she-beast. A foul, miserable creature, unmistakable with her frizzy hair, red face, whiny voice, and general cantankerousness. She is unpleasant, disagreeable, a vexation to all, and in need of sweet, soothing frostiness. It’s at times of such dire need, that I am wont to pull down my blender from its cabinet hiding place, and throw together the most potent heat-beating remedy I have in my arsenal, The Bushwacker.

The Bushwacker is a beverage I discovered (and fell immediately in love with) during a vacation in St. John, USVI. While the Islands are gorgeous, and it’s hard to be anything but happy while there, I will admit that the heat was a bit brutal. The Bushwacker came to be my respite from the heat, and kept me pleasantly grooving on that zen-like vibe. And because it is, as I said, summer, and those soaring temperatures are bound to harsh your chill as they do mine, I am sharing with you now, lovely reader, the recipe for this most epic of beverages. Please enjoy responsibly.


1. Fill a blender with ice.

Photograph of a Bushwacker
Photo courtesy of susannj of

2. Add in equal parts of:

  • Vodka
  • Light Rum
  • Kahlua
  • Frangelico
  • Amaretto
  • Creme de Cacao
  • Bailey’s Irish Cream
  • Cream of Coconut
  • Light Cream or half & half

3. Blend until creamy and frothy.
4. Drizzle some chocolate syrup into the inside of a glass.
5. Pour creamy, frothy, yumminess from the blender into said glass.
6. Enjoy.
7. Repeat at regular intervals until total relaxation is achieved.

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